Jason King
AmyHuangHorror Foods - the Candwich
July 10th 2010 22:12
Why oh why do people feel the need to make amd invent hideous food ideas?
The latest innovation in sandwich technology is the Candwich, the sandwich in a can.
The foodstuff is sold inside a 3oz pop-top can and comes in three delicious flavors: PBJ Strawberry, PBJ Grape, and BBQ Chicken. Thankfully, only the first two have candy surprises inside.
Its makers, Mark One Foods, hope to go into production later this year, maybe after its inventor clears up that whole nasty SEC lawsuit that alleges he took investors money intended for real estate investments and put it in canned sandwiches instead.
Their website claims it is the perfect product for people on the go such as students, construction workers, soccer mums and outdoor enthusiasts. I pray these people aren't idiots and would prefer to make their sandwiches at home and with a bit more beneficial content in it. The Peanut butter and jelly flavours contain candy surprises - wtf is that??
The website also claims it has a long shelf life - and while this assures me it has more crap in it than a McDonalds burger - the site states it's "perfect for emergency food storage needs in the event of natural disasters" - if this is what I have to eat after a natural disaster I hope I am at the epicentre of said disasters
It is nearly as bad as my other hideous favourite food - the chicken in a can
The latest innovation in sandwich technology is the Candwich, the sandwich in a can.
The foodstuff is sold inside a 3oz pop-top can and comes in three delicious flavors: PBJ Strawberry, PBJ Grape, and BBQ Chicken. Thankfully, only the first two have candy surprises inside.
Its makers, Mark One Foods, hope to go into production later this year, maybe after its inventor clears up that whole nasty SEC lawsuit that alleges he took investors money intended for real estate investments and put it in canned sandwiches instead.
Their website claims it is the perfect product for people on the go such as students, construction workers, soccer mums and outdoor enthusiasts. I pray these people aren't idiots and would prefer to make their sandwiches at home and with a bit more beneficial content in it. The Peanut butter and jelly flavours contain candy surprises - wtf is that??
The website also claims it has a long shelf life - and while this assures me it has more crap in it than a McDonalds burger - the site states it's "perfect for emergency food storage needs in the event of natural disasters" - if this is what I have to eat after a natural disaster I hope I am at the epicentre of said disasters
It is nearly as bad as my other hideous favourite food - the chicken in a can
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The lawsuit states Travis raised $145 million from 175 investors between 2001 and 2009 for an alleged real estate venture. In that time span, the only pieces of real estate he purchased was one random $6 million property and $15 million home for himself, which he then paved the driveway in cobblestones from France.
The rest of the money went into the crazy scheme known as the Candwhich.
Alas, now the tastu treat making Hot Pockets quiver in fear may never see the light of day. If Travis is found guilty, he'll have to pay all that money back and then some, we're sure. Even if he rushed released those canned PBJ's, they would never make enough money in time, though they would surely stay fresh for years to come.
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Thanks for the added info Deni - I do mention it in the article - but not as detailed. But he is the food mafia - he will survive and watch out now you have mentioned it - you could be on his list now
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By the way, great blog!!
Cheers.
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It is a hideous form of food.
Sorry for my delay in response - I got burgled by Satan's Spawn and have been computerless for a week. Assholes stole my new computer, my baby is gone but thankgod for insurance